What the f***!! x-(

First of all…an update on my previous post. I did go to the party last night. Nd I had decided that I'll dedicate a full fledged post to the party nd all the gossips that happened. Believe me, I would have been writing about that only right now, had the other disaster not happened! M so upset and hopeless that I can anytime decide against writing this post. So, let's just get started..

It so happened, that me nd my friend went all the way to Sadar Baazaar for some "cheap" shopping. (For which. I eventually had to pay heavily!) x-( I'll not go into the unnecessary details and would come to the point right away. We took a rickshaw to the metro station while returning. (Get ready..the climax is here) Some asshole came right next to me and snatched my wallet from my hand and ran away like a dog with his stupid tail on fire! I lost my debit card and yeah…money too! Nd the saddest part, we couldn't do anything! :( Yes! I immediately called my bank's customer care helpline and got my card blocked. That's the first question people ask me when they hear my story. So now, I pretty much know what details are important to tell when you recite an incident like this.

Yeah, so one thing is clear…that this whole Universe is conspiring against me. I've been having unusually terrible days since a few weeks now. Nd it's not that m not learning any lesson! I am learning a whole new lesson with every thing that is coming along my way. But, the thing is I feel flooded with so many lessons now! I don't want any other lesson!! M too tiny to take all this load! x-(

Hellooooo!! God!!! Are u listening to me??? :-/

The Holiday Party

That's right. I have a Holiday party tomorrow. Nd m not at all excited. Nd neither m I going with the cliche' that 'M not a party person', which actually was my mantra for a long time. Very recently I realized that I do enjoy parties; :) Anyway, that's not the issue!

M not looking forward to the party because of my own mistake! So, the thing is that the whole office knew about the party since November. Nd we got around three to four reminders for registering ourselves for the party. Nd u guessed it right! I did not register myself. Nd when do I realize my simple mistake? Today! x-( Nd they say it's too late now to register yourself, which, sadly though, seems to be fairly reasonable. I'll have to go to the party as somebody's guest now. Nd m not able to find any "somebody"! :( Everyone is getting a guest!

Actually, I did register for the party. But God only knows what I registered myself for! Anyways, whatever happened to that form now! Huh! Already, I was feeling so high about myself that this had to happen! I feel mad at myself for being so stupid, so careless and so very dumb! I definitely need to be more disciplined nd more responsible! Now, what to i do to feel better? Usually, when m mad at somebody, I stop talking to that person for a day or two. M mad at myself. How do you not talk to yourself! x-(

M off to some deep breathing now nd a deeper thinking. Hope to write next time in a better mood. :-|

Learning..

Its been four months since I started working. Nd I've already reached the point where you start musing over the purpose of your life. (Too soon! Isn't it?) But seriously, everything looks rosy in the beginning. But, when you sit down and look back, its not that beautiful as you thought it'd be.

Gosh! I sound too depressed. Its not Google. So far, Google has been the best thing that has happened to me. It's just me nd it's one of those times where you realize that you still have a long...long way to go. Perhaps, even longer than you ever imagined. Nd the question that's scaring the hell out of me is whether I'll ever be able to really do something about it or not! Will I ever be able to make it worthwhile?

This is pretty much all that's going on in my mind these days. Thinking, thinking and a lot more of thinking. Nd few things that might sound stupid but, that keep me going through this are shopping, movies and the thought, which by the way is not stupid, that every person at some point in his life finds himself in a situation like this and finds himself alone and also, finds a way through it on his own.

Now, I sound too philosophical! Actually, I don't like writing emotional nd philosophical stuff in my blog. But, sometimes you just want to let it out. That's what I did. May be, I'll read this post someday in future nd laugh it off with a tinge of embarrassment. :)